Engage’s VP of Love, Trish McDermott popped up on CNN last week to chime in on the mixed messages people receive when dating. It seems guys are confused about the signals women are sending in relationships. Says Trish:

“For all the communicating singles are now doing using the plethora of social media available to them, men and women still aren’t necessarily hearing each other. Most men still think they should pay for the first date, but most women don’t agree. On the other hand, women still expect gentlemanly courtesies such as having the door held open for them.”

Trish’s commentary helps men decode the signals. Of course, as our VP of Love, we think Trish is always fabulously insightful when it comes to the dating game. Her advice also illustrates why it’s so important to get a reality check from your friends when you’re dating. What if someone is really into you but you’re missing the signals?

When in doubt, ask a friend for their read on the situation and you might discover that the super cute and sassy object of your affection is totes reciprocating your interest — but you’re just so wrapped up in disbelief that you’re missing the super obvs cues. Or you could just subject yourself to a life of unanswered questions about “What might’ve been.” But where’s the fun in that?

“Oh Canada!” Our very own VP of Love, Trish McDermott popped up on Calgary Today with Mike Blanchard. Download the show from SendSpace and listen to Trish’s expert opinion on the state of online dating and relationships. Pretty savvy, eh?

Do you agree? Take our “Romancing the Geek” survey. Then read on…

Not a lot has changed in mate selection in the last forty thousand years. In the good old days of dating, accomplished hunters were hot prospects in the eyes of many a cave girl. Strength, speed and agility would have been attributes all Paleolithic women checked as desirable in a mate on their online dating profile. Those traits were necessary for Neanderthal bachelors to slay a mammoth or two and assure a future family’s survival.

While some dating desires have evolved over the years, women today are still attracted to hunter-providers. It’s in our DNA. Even as we’ve become fully capable of slaying our own modern-day mammoths, we continue to seek affluent, tall, well educated, and professionally successful romantic partners because they can bring home the goods we’re hard-wired to need for happily-ever-after.

Are geeks the new hunter heroes?

If forty really is the new thirty and pink is the new black, then geeks may be the new hot, hunky mammoth hunters of single women’s dreams. Geeks tend to be well educated, hard working, successful, and often are involved in startups that may provide a better world for all of us.

Who brought us the clean-tech movement? Scientist geeks. Who reconnected us to online communities that help us thrive? Internet geeks.

Geeks aren’t necessarily tall. Many hunch over a laptop all day or generally keep their head down to avoid eye contact. Maybe if we uncurled them we’d find that geeks are actually taller than their less tech-savvy counterparts — a pleasantly sexy surprise. But even slumped over, many geeks are hot dating prospects today.

Geek Goes Chic

Engage goes to Hollywood on April 10th for the TechCrunch and PopSugar “Geek Goes Chic” party. We’ll demo new site features and play matchmaker for TechCrunch geeks and PopSugar style mavens hoping to get their romantic groove on. Whether you’re a geek yourself, or might date a geek someday, please take the Engage “Romancing the Geek” survey. We want you to weigh in on how hot, hunky, and romantic geeks really are.

If you’re a geek hoping to meet the woman of your dreams with us in Hollywood, or out there in the big world of dating, check out this DailyIdea video for a few tips on meeting girls.

See you in Hollywood!

Trish McDermott
VP of Love, Engage

As the CEO of Engage, I’m honored to write the first Engage blog post. Our company is excited to be able to communicate with you this way – and we’re looking forward to watching the blog become a fun part of your experience on our site. This first post is extra special for me because of the topic: My recent wedding in Goa, India. It was an amazing event for my wife and I, and I wanted to share it with you.

And now… welcome to my wedding!
My wife Amrita and I met the same way most people meet: through a friend’s introduction. This happened just before I co-founded Engage, so I started the world’s first social dating site at the same time that I was falling in love. Engage has evolved at the same time as my relationship — and just two weeks ago, Amrita and I were married.

Our wedding took place over three days in December, in Goa, India — and wow, what a wedding it was! It’s difficult to describe an event that you’re at the center of, but I can only say it was magical. We were surrounded by nearly all of our family and friends, many of whom had come from great distances. And we were in one of the most exotic places in the world, warmed by the waters of the Arabian Sea. The combination was electric.

I kept a journal of the wedding events and thought you’d like to see a bit of our amazing adventure:

Getting there was hard.
The journey started out with a rock-solid swindle. You see, Scotch is big in India and I needed a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue Label. So I waited until I was in SFO, duty-free. The sales rep in the store convinced me that the price, a “meager” $136/bottle (!), was on par with all duty-free shops worldwide. (He claimed that the dollar’s nosedive would, if anything, drive up pricing elsewhere in the world.) So, I bought that bottle and lugged it halfway across the world. After a grueling 14+ hour trip to Taipei, my first stop from SFO to Goa, I went straight to the duty-free shop to check prices. Bleary-eyed and jet-lagged at 2 a.m., I broke out my phone calculator and discovered that the sales rep had a unique interpretation of the global economy: Here was the same bottle for 40% less! I then had a multi-hour layover, seven hour flight to Mumbai, and 45 minute flight to Goa – all-in-all about 12 hours, 53 minutes, and 14 seconds to mull over the strength/weakness of the dollar. But at least I had the Blue Label.

The world changed.
Once in Goa, I checked into the Taj Hotel. Suddenly, I was in a different world. The Taj is designed like an authentic Goan village, complete with Portuguese-Goan terracotta-roofed cottages lining Sinquerim Beach in North Goa. After a nap and some lunch, I headed out to the bar to meet up with friends who had already arrived. On the menu? Champagne and scotch. (Yes, in that order). Just a taste or two before I met up with the TV crew…

Chilling at the Taj upon arrival

 

 

The 3 Events
Night One: The Sangeet. A festivity of song and dance to celebrate the engagement and upcoming marriage. Theme: Shades of White
Okay, so at this point I should probably mention the TV show. Our traditional Indian wedding was made a little extra special thanks to my sister-in-law, Avantika. She not only organized every detail of the event but she also convinced Indian media company NDTV to cover our nuptials for a TV show called “My Big Fat Indian Wedding.” So I had all the usual pre-wedding jitters on camera! With Avantika organizing, many of the events and settings to come were a surprise for me and Amrita… starting with the Sangeet.

I didn’t know what to expect at the Sangeet that night. When the evening rolled around, I was running late. Most of the guests had already left for the party via buses. A special air-conditioned car had been organized for me and my family. That would’ve been great but I couldn’t locate my family! I ended up piling into a car with my Mom, my future mother-in-law, and her brother in-law (it was a serious conversation). We sped off into the dark on a long, bumpy dirt road that led straight into the jungle. Now I was worried.

When I arrived, I was blown away. This was my first impression…

 

Followed by my 2nd impression: Diego (from San Francisco) flirting with my new cousin Mallika (a Bollywood actress).

 

The bartenders were putting on one heck of a show.

 

 

Karen (Engage’s other co-founder) and her husband Scott enjoyed the view.

 

 

I don’t think the slide show in the background got much attention!

 

 

The paparazzi snapped…

 

 

White was everywhere.

 

 

And I finally had a first dance with my wife-to-be.

 

 

 

Night Two: The Mehendi. The application of Mehendi (henna) designs to the hands and feet.
This is a really beautiful Indian tradition. The deep color of mehendi signifies the prosperity that the bride will bring to her new family. Color theme: Palettes of yellow-orange.

So after the spectacular Sangeet, I didn’t know what to expect for the second night of celebration. What could top it? I showed up to what looked like a mini amphitheatre shrouded in sunshine yellow colors, except it didn’t have the concrete feel of an amphitheatre but rather of a fine restaurant with no roof (perfect for the 85 degree temperature). It was really quite incredible – I’ve never seen anything like it anywhere. The food and drinks matched the exotic décor. Of all the wedding events, this was the most casual night and nearly all the women (and many of the men) had mehendi (you might know it as henna tattoos) applied in some creative ways.

“I Would Dye4U!” Amrita gets the mehendi applied to her hands.

 

 

Followed by a lift in the middle of the dance floor.

 

 

Avantika and Ananya distribute bangles for the ladies.

 

 

And to top it off, my Harvard B-School friends put on a last-minute skit.

 

 

Night Three: The Wedding and Reception. (Theme: Formal, traditional colors.)
The wedding ceremony is conducted in Sanskrit; the fire-deity (or the sacred fire) serves as the primary witness, while the bride and groom encircle it seven times together.

Okay. The big day is here and I’m worried about the heat. It’s December 20^th. It’s 88 degrees out. The snowman is made out of sand. And there are Christmas trees and wreathes everywhere but somehow it’s hard to believe Christmas is just a few days away.

This is the day we’ve waited for. There are multiple ceremonies to get through before the actual wedding and reception… and the story’s best told with pictures. Here we go…

Wedding day afternoon – Amrita takes part in a ceremony for the bride, her friends, and her family.

 

 

My picture-perfect bride does a photo shoot on the hotel grounds.

 

Amrita’s family escorts her to the meeting point between her family and mine, at the entrance.

Meanwhile, I’m on my way to the venue… (That’s me in the middle of the back seat)… with a little dancing in the street.

I arrive at the destination surrounded by my family and friends.

A big moment: The families meet.

As the sun sets, we’re minutes from being married.

One of the many photos just after the ceremony.

The reception area is about to get packed.

Amrita dancing at the reception.

A final pose for photos before the night is over.

 

Thanks for joining Amrita and I on our journey! I’d like to wish each of you, in turn, an amazing year and lots of fun and success on Engage. Please share your stories with us along the way.

Best wishes,
Suneet Wadhwa
Engage CEO

P.S. Be on the lookout for great new things happening here at Engage! While I’m bursting at the seams to share the latest news about our service, I have to hold my tongue until our marketing guy says it’s okay to talk. Bookmark our blog to stay in touch: blog.engage.com.